And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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