We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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