everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
My vagina just recognized that song.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
