lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
