You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
