we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
