I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Randomize