if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
