Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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