Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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