Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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