I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
