I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
