Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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