well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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