i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
