guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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