Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
