is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
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