but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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