I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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