No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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