There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
