i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize