lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
