No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
