R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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