you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
