Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
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