Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
