Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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