Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
