Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
