i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
