she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
