"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I think a kid would responsible me up
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
