every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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