Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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