im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
