That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
