You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
