nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Come share oat with me in your robe
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
