why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
