i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
