I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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