I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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