Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
