Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
