ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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