I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize