i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
