I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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