If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
